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My RPG vision

Started by Mion Sonozaki, 12, February, 2010, 09:31:08 PM

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Mion Sonozaki

Hey.
I don't know any other way to go about this, so I'll just be very direct on this:


I have an rpg vision. One inspired by many of the rpgs that had made up my childhood, and even my present day memories. Especially notable inspirations for this is Grandia and Xenogears.



But I also have in the vision.. my own story. My own tales and characters. Something.. Well, something I honestly dream to bring to life. And this is not your average "My dream is to _____". This is something I've put the effort with my heart and soul into.

So here is the outline and concepts I have. It's unorganized, and I'm sure there are typos I maybe forgot to fix.
I haven't really set in stone the events that happen in the story though. If someone is interested in helping me at least write and develop the latter in this plot, it would be HUGELY appreciated  :VenusSet:

And yes, this is for a GS hack once the editor is done. Maybe it seems out of proportion, but I don't see why it wouldn't be possible in Golden Sun TLA. It's just a matter of scripting everything, and drawing. And I can do pixel art. So I wouldn't see why this project would be any more difficult than another golden sun hack, assuming when the editor is complete.
Although I must say that the sooner the editor is finished, the sooner I can start further development on fulfilling my vision  :happy:


Remember that this is unorganized. You DO have to read all the character profiles to understand the gist of the story since I haven't fleshed out the events yet, which, I'll repeat I need someone to help me write.

So enjoy the outline and concepts, don't steal, and please let me know what you think!  :Garet:

Quote(Unorganized) RPG Plot Outline


Background:

Long ago, when earth was all but waste, the atmosphere all but void, the seas all deserted, humans had once suffered for centuries in hellish, wasteland environments. However, a miracle one day appeared and there came 4 arthropodan deities from another world who took pity upon the humans living in these lands.
These deities, with their combined powers, shaped the land from the deserts and sands they were, into lush, green mountains, giving air and oxygen to the atmosphere and filling the pits of the land into sea and ocean.

However, these deities, as much as they pitied the humans, were not immortal and their life span was bound to an end.
They created 4 magic eggs which maintain their influence on the land. However, if an egg would shatter, the entire element itself representing the egg would shatter as well, there for weakening, until it reverts back to how it was during a wasteland-like state.
In return, they also created a seed of each of themselves in the form of avatars to remind humanity of their actions. These avatars were literally equal to that of a normal human being. But they were not the guards for the magic eggs, but rather the possessor of the historical knowledge. However, the deities also created a single demi-god guardian of a "time" element to watch over the eggs with the ability to repair them, who would reincarnate through each generation, not being susceptible to aging, unlike the other deities who were human beings with the need to reproduce just as any other human.
Sure enough however, humans sought these great eggs of power. Eventually, humans raged war amongst one and other for these eggs.
It wasn't shortly until its guardian had enough. Unable to tolerate the bloodshed any longer, with all her might, she bordered the humans with a giant wall and buried the eggs deep underground all over the world, where no one would find and gather them all at once.

Unable to fight each other, with all mentioning of the eggs erased from past history, humans once again became civil and ended their war for power over the eggs.
With peace returning and the guardian's purpose becoming less and less meaningful, with each reincarnation of herself, she became less and less aware of her own purpose and self.
Eventually, the guardian once again reincarnated, but this time as a normal girl with normal human abilities, much like the avatars. However, unlike the avatars, she possessed not of their knowledge, with no recollection of past memory whatsoever. Peace at this point seemed eternal however.
At least.. That's how it seemed.
With technology and magic knowledge advancing, the mysteries of these eggs were slowly revealing themselves, and there was no guardian to protect it anymore.

The curiosity and greed of human nature. Just like the arthropodan deities, everything comes to an end and dies, with another incarnation to take its place. Greed too, was inevitable to return in this day and age of advancement.






Pre-thoughts on development:

What I want to do with this is focus on the definitions and meanings of reality. Reality itself, emotions, and all such things can be considered "illusions". Yet being illusions, we act upon them, and society is based on such illusions.
But furthermore, what I want to totally aim for is not the destination and end of the story, but the adventure and experience that accompanies it and its characters. As you will notice in the plot, a majority is character driven as opposed to situational phenomenoms. For the characters to even celebrate christmas is a scenario I had in mind, learning from each other and their travels, developping slowly from someone they were from the start, to one totally different by the end.
In fact, for the start of the story, there would be no clear antagonist revealed and no specific objective set. Just three characters who set out on an adventure across the world and try to uncover the ancient ruins and relics that exist within it. However, along the way, they encounter a number of quests aside from their main adventure of uncovering the history of the world. Many such sub-plots for example, such as a sub-plot where they must free a prince that was going to be sacreficed to a dragon.

The character "Shion" is the greatest example of character development and why she's of the 3 "main" characters most key to the story (Menlo, Kagra, Shion). She starts off as one manipulative, but later develops feelings as a friend, conflicting with her goals to decieve you.
So her conflict is of the multiple feelings she has. One of her true intentions and desires, but one also as the friend she has been faking for so long.

The relationship of Menlo and Kagra and how it unfolds once they get caught up in the truths of their world is also another key factor in one of the concepts of illusions that's used. And as those truths unfold, so is the history of damages left by human life in general.
Which brings up the questions of perfection vs imperfection and the tolerance for such damages vs liberation.

Humans have light. And humans have darkness.
This darkness spreads its influence to even the smallest of nursery villages, where new born babies sleep amongst, and the results are genocide.
Throughout the story, I also want to focus on the concept of illusions vs reality, and how reality can sometimes be an illusion, and an illusion reality. But in the end, illusion or reality, you have to accept what happens.
And that though humans are also imperfect with their darkness, they always have light.

Like a tree, desires are natural things to a human being; A necessity for human life.
However, when desires become to great, they become greed and evil; Darkness. A tree quickly overgrows and becomes dangerous. And it keeps spreading, for countless ages, until it goes on for so long that a single tree becomes utterly out of control and ultimately takes over, destroying everything in its path.

But at the same that, that tree may as well be an illusion. And that illusion may be an illusion of an illusion.




Characters and other info:

Element - Deity/Familiar Form -

Earth - Bee
Fire - Scarab
Wind - Dragonfly
Water - Crayfish


Party member Character combat and Weapons/other info (Backstories are later into story):

Menlo
Heavy Fighter
Element: Water
Weapons: Light Blade, Scythes, Chrono Blade

Menlo is your average paladin-esque character with well balanced stats and a high array of both supportive and offensive attacks. Later into the game he is able to use scythes instead of light swords, which utilize powerful secondary effects. And even later, he obtains the Chrono Blade which is the strongest weapon in the game with a powerful secondary effect.

Shion
Light Fighter
Wind
Weapons: Light Blade, Swords, Staff

Although a light fighter who one would think is caster oriented, Shion's roles in combat are very flexible. She can equip a staff and use a wide array of offensive spells hitting multiple enemies, or she can use a sword as a "glass cannon" character with extremely high attack, but fragile defenses.

Kagra:
Light Fighter
Fire
Weapons: Light Blade, Daggers, Mace, Fan

While she is a balanced fighter, when compared to Menlo her weapon variety is much low, making her rather limited. To compensate, she has powerful spells. She is more caster oriented than Shion, but she is more of a spell-blade fighter who's spells utilize a combination of both magical and physical strength.

Kyoko:
Caster
Earth
Weapons: Staff, Mace

Kyoko takes on the appearance of a very small kid. So her health and physical strength is not very high. But she compensates with excellent defenses and supportive spells that can do a variety of roles ranging from resurrecting, healing, stat boosting, and causing enemies to suffer from disadvantages such as poison. But aside from support, she also has very powerful spells that are more powerful than Kagras if equipped with a staff in which grants her a boost.

Shizu:
Caster
Wind
Weapons: Staff, Mace

Shizu lives up to the "caster" and "wind" name by being based on multi-target combat. Her normal spells alone deal less single-target damage than Kyoko, but if she is customized properly, she may take on the roles of a party healer or the highest spell damage in the game at the cost of much PP. Since she has demon blood, she is capable to use weaker summons of creatures to fight for her. However, higher level summons leave her with incredibly low PP.

Olias:
Caster
Water
Weapons: Scythe, Light Blade, Staff

Olias, unlike what Scythes imply, is a party supporter. However, unlike Kyoko, he plays a more serious role of support during combat with much more options available at once. He also has a big more offensive power than the other casters, but his uses of weapons are more so for the magic inherit effects. Or more specifically, the "caster weapons" other characters use that aren't suited for the purpose of spell casting.

Lukas:
Heavy Fighter
Fire
Weapons: Daggers, Light Blade, Sword, Mace

Lukas can use all the weapons but staffs and Chrono blade. In battle, Lukas fights in a mecha suit. As a result, while he does not have the physical pump of Menlo, he is the bulkiest and most likely to survive a party wipe.
As a physical fighter, he has a small array of weak heals and a revival, but he does not have much PP.
The trick to Menlo is that he is an emergency medic with great defenses, and great offense if used properly.
*note*To clarify, his "mecha" is his in-battle sprite*note*

Cyan:
Light Fighter
Earth
Weapons: Fan, Scythes, Mace

Cyan has attack almost equal to Lukas. However, because Lukas has much greater weapon variety, Cyan is left out in the cold with weapon inferiority. However, he has the most speed and can be customized into a party healer. By default however, his spells focus on high single target damage. He has the highest spell damage next to Shizu but his spells cost much less.




Rosewood village
The hometown of the two protagonists - Menlo and Kagra. Also lived the great adventurer or otherwise "historian" Togo, who mapped out and excavated many new locations of the world, uncovering great relics.
However, this village was massacred by a beast who's actions are the result of the Earth Avatar being experimented on. Only Menlo and Kagra managed to survive, but they cannot recall what specifically allowed them to do so either. They just "survived". The area was later investigated by the Shiro Empire.

Familiars
Familiars are similar to the avatars in the fact they represent the deities. However, unlike the avatars, they're more so just simple beings of high magic who take on the form of the deity of their element. Familiars have the power to grant others great magical power, amongst many other abilities. In numbers, they can temporarily manifest into creatures of all sorts of forms and strengths, varying from a dragon to aid their user, or giant mecha to shoot pulses of missiles at enemies.They also have the ability to amplify their users strength as well.
Familiars are very simple-minded, and they are sometimes collected by exotic pet owners.However, because of their combat abilities, they're also used by fighters.
Their personality usually varies and depends on their partner they are contracted with. One can be silly, michievous, and eating your chips, while the other could be staring into your soul with wolf-like eyes.
Because they usually reflect their partner's personality, their reason to fight is as much as their partner's. Although some of them require taming.


Menlo

A young teenage boy who dreams of adventure who idolizes historians and famous adventurers, especially Togo. He has a very quiet nature and low self-esteem of himself. As a result, people have always picked on him when he was younger. Menlo is such lacking in confidence, he apologizes for saying sorry.

During a childhood event, when the Menlo collided with the his friend - Kagra, it created a time paradox where he obtained a fraction of the time element. However, this paradox had caused a number of the elemental eggs to have their seals removed. It was bound for military research. The discovery of the existence of the eggs had been confirmed and half of them were obtainable once again, top secret military sought to find them. However this time existed the technology to scale the wall that prevented humans from doing so earlier, and there was no true guardian to moderate the balance of power of the safety of the element.
On the flip time, the collision provided him a share of the time element, granting him survival from the Rosewood massacre, in which he and Kagra were found and "rescued" by a girl named Shion who befriended Menlo and Kagra.

Shiro:
The antagonist.
A tall, caped figure with cold eyes. Caped, with leather boots, he commands over the Shiro Military Empire as their very emperor. With one insect wing of veins, the other like that of hell's butterfly, his left arm is nonexistent, but instead a mantis-like scythe with monstrous vine-like tentacles wriggling out of control on the same side of his body.

He believes humans have been suffering for far too many years and he seeks to end all genocide in the world through "Project Yggrasil" - a project to reawaken the guardian goddess who's power had deceased from the world. Through the goddess, he would be able to ask of her to perfect humanity and end all wars once and for all. To him, Project Yggrasil is the "war to end all wars".
World peace was a dream of his, where monster-like beings and humans alike, all races and colors, could live together in harmony, as being of the same planet instead of labeling themselves in groups different to each other.
Despite his appearance, he was actually a very kind-intentioned man who, to the people of his empire, was a beauty trapped inside a beast's body.

However, as Project Yggdrassil progressed,  he suddenly became more and more corrupt over time. With the need to take more and more drastic measures to fulfill his intentions, he came to the conclusion that he had to give up his humanity for the sacrifices needed. To gain, one must lose. That is why he had he had the hypnotist acquaintance of his - Shion, induct hypnotic suggestions that will make him less hesitent to further actions. However, Shion took advantage of her position and slowly began to brainwash him as a way to fulfill her own vision of Project Yggdrasil.
Eventually however, the power flipped and it was Shiro who had power over Shion as opposed to her having power over him.
Shiro, corrupted, used his position to control and oppress. What was once the capitalist republic society of the Shiro Empire became fascist communism. Yet Shiro, in the state he was, could not truly harm his people, but instead took things out on the surrounding nations and lands. Below,  hidden away from society, he and his military conducted confidential inhuman experiments anyone would tremble over.
To gain, one must lose. A "small" sacrifice for a "greater" good.

Shion
One of Togo's subordinates in his past adventures and excavations. A very intelligent individual, her long, blue hair reflects it. She lives the present day as a hypnotherapist and philosopher in the Shiro Empire kingo. The master pulling the strings throughout earlier events by the present-day Shiro empire military and the plot, she wants to carry out Project Yggdrasil not to benefit humanity, but because humans, in her eyes, became evil after the influence of the 4 deities; She wants to liberate humanity.

She knows Kagra is somehow linked to the 4 eggs that give the world its magic power, however they cannot be destroyed no matter how abused they are. Shion's knowledge on the ancient history was also limited compared to Shiro, and does not know the exact link Kagra has to the 4 eggs other than she possesses the ability to unseal their chambers. As a result, she resorts to befriending her and observing Kagra and Co's actions to gain a better understanding of the situation, eventually manipulating them into unlocking the secrets of the eggs. However, as her plans are near complete, she realizes her actions are contradicting her true intentions and questioning her motives. She fights together, travels together, breaths together... With the only friends she ever had.. Only to throw them away like garbage in the end?

As one conspiring with the Shiro Empire, she sought as much historical knowledge as she could on the land.
As a result, she took initiative in the past to join Historian Togo on his various excavations throughout the years. Through this, she learned many things about past culture, and that was when her intentions were made to liberate humanity.
In the past, before the deities, humans lived under the shadow of monsters who ruled over them. However, after the influence of the deities, humans grew in intelligence and the roles reversed. It was not humans who were under the shadow of monsters, but monsters under the shadow of humans. Humans treated the inferior savages like waste and trash, and took advantage of them for manual labor. However, it escalated. The definition of "monster" evolved itself, and even creatures on good terms with humans were becoming treated as "monsters". Darkness fell, and these "monsters" were being hunted not for trade, not for survival, but simply to satisfy the sadism and entertainment humans have over seeing helpless "monsters" having their abdomens sliced open vertically with flesh-cutting saws, like knives cutting butter, and them having their organs gently pulled out and thrown to the viewing audience.
Specie by specie, groups of "monsters" fell extinct. Only the strongest savages of the monsters survived to today.
In present day, humans did not do it as much as they did in the past. However, the sour scar of humanity's capabilities still exist today with the extermination of thousands of species.

Shion wants to "save" the world by cleansing humanity of all emotion and back into the organic machines they once were. She believes that though humans thrive with emotions, a shadow also retains in humanity's heart as long as emotion and free will exists. There for, because she loves the world, it is to her responsibility as the world's leading military power to rebuild humanity and "save" the world.

However, in her travels with Menlo and Kagra and Co. she also learns the positives of humanity. As a secret government member of sorts to the Shiro Empire, her only true friend was Olias who grew up with her in a similar life as military members. Since childhood, she lived a life of entire discipline and automation where everything had been preplanned and automated for her. Shion was a fetus, listening to tidbits and learning about the outside world from her womb. She wasn't truly born into the world until she became Kagra's friend. Even if her original plans were to manipulate, she was only awakened into the world after she created an illusion that she too, had been tricked of.
Shion not only manipulated others, but she manipulated herself. She too, was an imperfect human whom she sought to liberate. That is why she accepted the illusion she had of herself when she joined Menlo and Kagra and Co. and destroyed the illusion she had of an illusion. What was the true illusion? Her position and role? Or her emotions and feelings?

As she throws away her act and tries to end her plan of liberating the world however, the emperor Shiro whom she had been manipulating, had been manipulating her to manipulate him as pardon for his actions to obtain the 4 elemental eggs - An action no normal human is emotionally able to let themselves preform normally. That is why people have gone mad, and there had been wars over the eggs. But in the end, whoever the culprit, the only one who had been manipulated from the start is the hypnotist with the extraordinary powers over the mind, and the brilliant intellect. Yet in the end, not even she could escape reality of the illusion that is emotions.


Kagra:
A small girl with a red cap and cape. She has long hair of a bright, silver white like strands of feathers, and a light, gentle skin tone. Kagra is an orphan who knows not where she comes from, or who she was brought up by. Only that she was one day "found" in a nearby forest by the great Historian Togo who raised her when she was younger at his hometown - Rosewood village.
Trained by Togo in the arts of Tessenjutsu, she focusing on her practising in the martial arts of fans and to a lesser extent - Knives, as opposed to worry about her origins. Quite the contrary to her discipline though, she's a very cheery girl who, like Menlo, has a love for adventure.
After the rosewood tragedy however, she started to question herself as she was exposed to the open world. was there answers somewhere out there?
In actuality, she is the time guardian the deities created and she isn't even aware of the fact or her true power. But were she to have her powers re-awakened, she would have the power to forge continents and flood seas. However, if she were to ever die, despite reincarnating, "Kagra" would die and along her soul with it.


Kyoko (And other backstory):

short yellow, yet messy hair with bee antennae. Short with big eyes and a tiny smile. Wears baggy jeans, and a black shirt, and yellow vest.

The avatar of a god who helped forge and shape the lands. But because she's merely an avatar, people pray and respect to her name even though the reality is she's a helpless little girl that has yet to unlock her potential. Furthermore, without knowing her personally, one could not tell from appearance she possesses the seed of the deities.

An avatar is a remnant of the power left by the deities to govern their element and retain the image of the gods, but an avatar possesses powers only equal to that slightly more than the average human. As avatars, they cannot use their true potential in power since they only contain but a small seed of the deities' powers. But had something were to dig out their true power, they would be that of a beast.

For the gods deities of the elements to disappear from the world only to leave avatars who cannot do anything a normal human cannot and a single guardian who forgot her role, the military empire sought to oppose the imperfections of their world through top secret military experiments on these avatars, and obtain the powers of the deities for themselves.
Eventually, a drug had been developed by them to forcefully draw out their power and exploit them.
Using this drug, the military planned to manipulate the avatars to expand their empire and revolutionize the world. However, they were only able to capture but one of the avatars who was Kyoko.
Through their military testing, they learned more and more about the deities. They discovered that alone, the avatars are weak. But together with the others, they develop a power to destroy countries in a mere matter of minutes. But furthermore, that they bear the responsibility to moderate the elemental eggs in the world had something were to ever happen to the guardian over time.

However, the military continuously researched the deity. Learning about them, and the secrets of the world. Eventually, came "Project Yggdrasil"
They finally tested the drug on the avatar.
With a test subject at last, they found that the drug, although enhanced one very much physically, damages one horribly mentally.
Side effects include psychosis, hallucination, manic-depression, madness, insanity, and amnesia.


As research progressed, they finally let free Kyoko after she had been so damaged mentally and she was no use to them anymore. She escaped back to an old forest village where lied the shrine with the earth egg - What stood in the village time past, all that stood there in the blood shed was a lost little girl who wishes she was human.

Olias:
The young general in the Shiro military empire. With long, silky, black hair and cold, yet mellow eyes, he's actually a man of honor and great sacrifices who wears the scarf atop his black, leather coat from his friend - Jagen, who died in army combat alongside him when he was younger.
In the past, the Shro Military was an empire of great pride and fairness to those around them, who fought for the freedom of humanity and other related civilizations. At that point, at such a young age, Olias grew high in the ranks and eventually rose to position of general and became part of more covert affairs of the empire. However, as time went by, the military became corrupt and only more so as research delved into ancient history of the deities and elements. Under king Shiro's orders, Olias was forced to raid village and torture innocent in "the name of benefiting humanity".
Despite being ordered, he's actually more human than one would think and is usually hard on himself and guilty of his actions.
Outside of the military, he's somewhat of an oaf who lives the high life or drinking, gambling, and of course, women. He thinks all of the world's problems can be solved with a few glasses of beer. As opposites as his two sides may be, they relate in the fact that he has to find any possible ways to deal with his stress and pressure as general.


Shizu:
Your average green-haired city girl living in the sky kingdom of Valni.
With her long hair blowing in the wind like grass in a plains, she lives a life of freedom as free as the wind in the skies.
She and her culture despise war and live up secluded in the clouds of "World's End" - The giant wall separating the world.

However, life where she lives wasn't always free like it was in present day. In the distant past, generations ago, when her nation lived on the ground, her culture comprised of wind demons who formed civilization together, living peacefully with one and other in their community. However, these demons had their kingdom invaded and their homes wrecked by war. Survivors of the genocide fled to nearby human villages where they mixed with normal humans. As time went by, the demons were no more, as the results of mating resulted in the production of a creature with the guise of a human, and with demon blood. Or otherwise better known as a "half-demon".
The villages,being mixes of both demon and human, concluded that to avoid further war with humans due to their differences, they would need to seclude themselves to a place where they could live together in harmony and peace, where they would be judged by actions and not by the background of their family tree. Their only option was to scale World's End and start a civilizations there using the precious resources and magics found at the heights of the wall. From there, the trial would be too difficult for non-wind demons to traverse, preventing any further genocide of the wind demon culture.

Shizu herself didn't have a pleasant past either, as she's an orphan. Her mother died of illness, while her father - Jagen, went to war alongside the Shiro empire as an ally. But she hasn't heard of her father's status since she was a young child.
So in comparison to her fellow citizens of the Valni kingdom, she especially despises war for causing the absence of her father in her life. However, before her father left, he made two hand-knittened scarfs for both of them to keep as promise of their bond, and in hope he would return. Shizu waited for years straight at her home, missing out on childhood and friends, waiting for him to return home. However, Jagen did not return home. And as the years went by, the scarf's material deteriorated along with her hope, bringing fourth to her a hidden bitterness she kept within herself deep down inside after she finally returned to society.
In Valni - The kingdom of the secluded tolerance and freedom, floating above the world, one would usually expect happiness and peace amongst its citizens. However, while Shizu was happy, deep, deep down inside she had a growing bitter by the day.
What did that bitterness mean? Was it more complicated than a simple hatred or sadness? Was she just miserable how everyone was happy but her? Or was it something she still has yet to discover? In demon culture, there is a saying that when one seeks answers to questions, a soul-seeking journey will bring them closer to their inner selves.

Shizu was not bitter because others were happy. She was not bitter solely because her father died either. She was bitter because she was frustrated with herself and helpless.

Lukas:
A young teen living at the sea-shore village of Arcadia. Some call him a techno-geek. Others call him a magician of machines. But he just (proudly) calls himself a nerd with a love for mechanics. At the same time, he use to often be picked on for such a reason.
He lives at a dormitory near the shorelines of the village where he buries himself in his studies and his hobby of invention creation. As a result, he is often regarded at a "brainiac", usually attracting girls with his smarts. But at the same time, he is usually oblivious to when there are girls who show interest towards him, even when they cross over to the guy's hot springs at the dorm to flirt with him.
Sometimes however, his technology goes overboard, even attracting military attention. Particularly, his recent experiment documents have been confiscated by them because they are "Technology too dangerous for the public to use".
In actuality, the documents were classified information on the history of the elements, the 4 eggs, and how to use the true power of the elements.
Lukas was able to retain and keep secret from them one invention using the classified information however. The "man-portable mecha" - a body of armor that morphs along with the wearer into a mecha.
With a majority of his hard work and research simply confiscated without his consent, his curiosity on what they did not want him to know only grew greater.

Cyan (Togo):
Cyan at first appears to be an old wandering adventurer roaming the land. However, with his incredible wisdom and knowledge of lore around him, those acquainting him are always curious and suspicious of this enigmatic figure.
With a cloak on his body and tilted beret on his head, it does not take long until he reveals his true self as Togo to Shion after he digs to the bottom of the Shiro military and their plans when Shion is about to carry them through, but he talks some sense into her.
Togo was a great adventurer and historian living at Rosewood village. However, his incredible intelligence, skill, and philosophy was what led him to becoming the great adventurer he was, as he uncovered relics by relics, dominating ruins by ruins, and deciphering texts by texts. As a result, he gained much attention across the land, and especially government attention. Eventually, he worked together in co-operation with the Shiro military who shared with him a common belief on the importance of history. With the funding gained by having a military on his side for excavations, his discoveries multiplied by the number. However, as he discovered more and more on the truth of the world, the elements, and ancient civilizations, he noticed the Shiro empire growing more and more corrupted which was when he dropped out of his excavations and changed his identity to observe their actions and true intentions without him.







*Other characters yet to be fully developed*

Final Scenario idea/thoughts

Something I had in mind is to have Kagra to become consumed by her own awakened power and become her true, awakened form to that of the guardian, or otherwise the "time goddess" - The combined power of the deities, with the power to bend history itself.

Menlo, who had been affected by a space-time split in the split second he bumped into her as a child and had obtained a fragment of the time element is the only one able to oppose the time god. There for making it a conflict who had not only grew up together and adventurered together, but loved each other. And now Menlo must come to realization of what the "true" Kagra had always been like past the illusion of her human form.
But illusions themselves are part of life. Illusions are part of reality and outcomes.
Menlo opposes the goddess herself to fight back for not just the illusion, but the piece of reality that is Kagra - One who had been part of Menlo's life since he was a child, who had been part of Kagra's life since she was a child.

It was no coincidence that in the childhood phenomenon where the goddess had forgot her purpose, or Menlo had obtained the time element. Deep down in her subconscious, Kagra knows what she was truly like. And all she ever wanted was to escape the flesh of a god and live the illusion we all have that is the imperfect human life - The life of a growing tree that isn't too big, or too small.


After Menlo and Co. obtain the fourth egg, Shiro ambushes them and kidnaps Kagra. In exchange for the eggs, Shrio forms a deal that Menlo will bring the eggs to him at Nefaros- The shrine where the world began, in exchange for Kagra's life. But to Shiro, killing Kagra wont make a difference because her life loops in reincarnation.
Knowing he is walking into a trap, Menlo is obligated to bring the eggs. Shion, knowing Shiro best out of the group, instead forms a plan to rescue Kagra without handing over the eggs. The plan backfires and Shiro takes the eggs by force, knocking out Mhenlo and Co. He sets the eggs on the shrine's alters as he force feeds Kagra the drug that would bring out her true nature and awaken her. Shiro, at last, finally fulfills his goal of bringing upon the time goddess to the world, and combining power with it, with his next goals to liberate humanity and reboot the world right after the goddess generates enough power in her awakening.
Tree roots ascend from the ground, carrying the shrine to the top of a giant tree that is Kagra's shell to her true form.
Menlo and Co. awaken at a nearby village where they were carried to by their familiars to save them. With them was the manifestation of Kagra's soulless body whom they possessed and saved everyone with when Kagra's true form awakened and left her body.
In the distance, the giant tree that is the guardian and time goddess of the world. Menlo and Co. had been knocked out for days, but in those few days, the abandoned Shiro empire from their emperor took initiative to guard the perimeter around the tree, waiting to fight off an incoming attack from it.
Menlo and Co. analyze the situation at hand and make preparations for the upcoming battles. During the preparations, Menlo tries to take in what had just happened to Kagra. He is confronted by Cyan/Togo, who reveals the truth about the deities, the world, and the guardian time goddess with the information he found on excavations he had not told anyone and had been keeping secret up until then.

The deities were actually beings from another world, where arthropod-like creatures apparently ruled, where they utilized highly advanced nanotechnology and manipulation of atomic structure in science. The "magic" they had blessed the world with was also no more than nanotechnology. All humans and life are born with small than atom-sized nanotechnology that spreads and gives them the magic abilities they posses. Meanwhile, the 4 eggs are simply generators that keep the nanotechnology in check with various other uses, such as acting as keys to "reboot" Kagra when she loses her power.
The fact the deities pitied humans was true though. When they landed on the planet, they originally wanted to do so for educational purposes of their own race. However, when they found tortured life existed on the planet, their actions quickly changed.
With the best of their technology, they funded a project for a being who would save these humans. However, the being was so strong that outside of the deities' supervision, it could very easily destroy the world because it was too perfect and the rest of humanity was not. Essentially, they created a monster; One like that of a god even in comparison to their own race. So they implemented a function in the being that it would lose its true power over time, when they would eventually be dead of old age. However, the 4 eggs also acted as keys to "reboot her"; To restore her power. These eggs were sealed away from humanity and only Kagra would normally be able to access them in the worst case scenarios.
What gave Kagra the power she possesses so much was an egg of her own inside of her. The "time" egg - A generator inside her very soul that allowed her to release her power all in one big blow and recharge.
Deep down the guardian did have fragments left of humanity. However, it served as nothing more than a mere tool that allowed her to act natural amongst the rest of society, and even that fragment did not leave a big enough crack for an imperfection. Her humanity was an illusion to the rest of humanity.


After Menlo prepares himself mentally, him and his party raid Kagra.
Travelling far into the tree, where space itself was twisted, they finally find the core; The time egg.
However, even after destroying the egg, Kagra's functions still did not cease. He is after confronted by Shiro who explains that Kagra had already recharged enough power that it isn't even needed anymore. And that even if she is rescued from the room he is guarding, "Kagra" will not revert and her true self will just reveal itself more. Menlo denies it and he fights Shiro. Shiro is killed once and for all, and Menlo enters the room where he carries her sleeping body out of the tree dungeon that surrounds them.
At last peace is restored.. Yet something was wrong. Kagra still slept from the time she was rescued. Sleeping for days and days, as days went by, Menlo stood by her side. However, as time went by, weird phenomenons occurred. Night was during day, and day was during night. Until suddenly, a field around Kagura exploded, enveloping everything there was to be in sight.
Shiro was right. Kagra had enveloped, and destroyed the entire universe in a twist of space and time because she had already awakened; It was too late.
However, Menlo's soul was not destroyed. He was able to oppose time because he, himself possessed the time element and always had since Kagra gave him such a power when they were kids.
They confront and Menlo argues that though he was up against the "true" Kagra, the Kagra Menlo loved, whether or not she is an illusion, is fighting within him and she is trapped within the body of the monster before them both.
"Kagra" is defeated and she comes to realization that even her true self.. And the concept of creating a perfect universe.. Even the powers of a god.. Is an illusion...
She agrees to restore the universe back and sealing away the eggs in a way no one, even herself, would not be able to unleash upon again. But doing such an action would have the guardian use so much power, she will be dead. Menlo agrees with that deal even though the guardian will die from exhausting all her power because Menlo has a promise he wanted to fulfill with Kagra, even if she would not be present.
Time reversed to before Kagra envelopes the universe, and she melts away in front of Menlo's eyes...






Years later, knowing Kagra was dead, Menlo once again scaled world's end to keep his promise.








In front of him, at the summit, was Kagra.
"Thank you.. Menlo... You've kept your promise...."

Was the guardian really bad? Or was she just living her illusion of reality?
We all live in an illusion.
There is no pure answer.
There for, there is no perfect either.
All we can do is live an imperfect life and illusion.

As for the whereabouts of the guardian, her death was not because she tried to restore the yesterday.
She sacrificed herself... For Kagra.
She learned from Menlo what it meant to be human. What it meant to love, and what it means to be happy.
But most of all, that sometimes being imperfect is a good thing.
It was time to restore Kagra. It was time to go back.. To the happy imperfect life.
To the world where there is a tomorrow.


-Climax/Final Battle-
Scripted event where Kagra distorts the space time after her body is "saved" from inside the tree of Kagra:

*Menlo waking up in a distorted space-like realm in front of Kagra
Menlo: Where am I..!? W.. Where is everyone?

Kagra: The world.. No.. Everything has been absorbed into a wave of destruction. Even your body has been absorbed into it. Only the fragment you have stolen of my power and your soul exist here in physical-like form. The form you see of me is but a perception your soul simply creates.

Menlo: Who are you!? Shiro? Whoever you are, it is you who put Kagra through so much pain!

Kagra: The one you call Kagra is right in front of you. I am Kagra. The real Kagra. After I regain the last ounce of my power back from you, I will be able to recreate the universe. A perfect universe. Nothing can stop me now. So what brought you to consciousness to ask me, Menlo?

Menlo: I came to save Kagra. You've already destroyed the universe and liberated all impurities. So please.. Whoever you are... Give her back!

Kagra: Fuhuhuhu.. Quite a stubborn one, aren't you? I already told you. I am the real Kagra. And I plan to recreate the universe. The nanotechnology running through my veins aren't just nanobots, but they contains the universal structure of perfect existence itself such as like that when the universe was first created. Philosophers say the universe was originally made from a big bang. And what they say is true. However, what they say about the big bang was also incomplete. There was one error made that happened by chance, where the atomic structure mutated. The results was life. An imperfect, horrendous tragedy that has plagued everything the moment they were born. I want to recreate everything and "fix" the big bang so that its results are perfect!

Mhenlo: You want to create the universe with no life? Kagra.. Is that what you truly desire?

Kagra: I want to "fix" life. I am the guardian. I have love for all living things, and it is my responsibility to give everything the best possibility, bypassing limits. It doesn't matter what it is. Humans.. Monsters.. Demons.. Familiars... You bastards, your instinct is nothing more than kill or be killed. It doesn't matter who has power. One will always be dominating the other, creating genocide, causing sadness.. anguish.. hate... fear.. and despair.. Such a universe.. Full of violence.. Even torturing other beings and defiling their vital organs, ripping them out of one's body just to entertain a crowd. Such a life and their so called "happiness" is but an illusion. But you see, everything one could ever truly desire is exactly what I'm trying to do. I'm trying to grant the true intentions of Shiro's "Project Yggdrasil" and benefit all life! What attachment could one possibly have to a hostile, violent, imperfect world? Why do humans cling so much onto their "love"? The perfect "love" is all created right here from me!!

Menlo: Kagra... No... Guardian Goddess.. We, life, are slow and will never reach perfection. But we have also come a long way.. And I'm not going to let go of how far we've came trying to be peaceful beings either! We won't be perfect, but we will progress! We will come to understand each other, and we will try!

Kagra: Your words are the imperfect lies humanity has been giving each other for thousand of years. "Kagra", the one you "love" is but an image in your selfish imagination of greed and lust. Do you, for example, even understand her? Do you know anything about her? This "love" you have for her is selfish and disgusting! All you and the rest of humanity do in your "love" is seduce each other for one's own benefits and pleasures! Even giving up your life, is done for image for the other person. You humans live an illusion!

Menlo: But illusions are not always the illusions they seem either. They are a way of life; Of society. Shiro lived a life deceiving others and terrible actions. But as the illusion of an emperor over his nation, his people loved him and deeper down, he loved his people! That is why despite his intentions, he couldn't hurt anyone of his empire! And just like Shiro, other humans also live illusions of emotions and purpose. That is the purpose of life! That is why the big bang mutated! The imperfectness and illusions of it is also within the purpose of life! That was the will of the big band and of life!

Kagra: Will... Such a primitive thing. It is because of will.. Because humans.. planets.. and all of life.. have this will... It is because of this cursed will that everything is so imperfect and tragic! Just like the thing you called "market" and "trade", one must lose something in order for another to gain. It is because of that there is war. Obviously will has plagued the universe since it began! It is because of how imperfect we are, things are so dreaded! I can't stand to watch the resulting destruction brought upon yourselves.. It is because things are so imperfect, they must be liberated! That is not the will of me, but the will of the very life you're defending right now. Life loses to benefit other life! So the universe has to be destroyed to make way for a better universe!

Menlo: Well.. If we're not perfect.. If one loses and another gains.. We don't need to be perfect. Actually, that is exactly what has made us fragile humans so strong. When at error, you try to solve the problems. When one else is in need, we help the other. That's what life is about. We feel sadness, anger, hate, and greed... But we also feel happiness, sympathy, love, and hope!
We aren't perfect because we are capable more than that. Life becomes stronger as their imperfectness grows!
As the last life in the universe.. A shard that broke off from the time element.. An imperfect creature.. I'm not upset, but proud I was of life! I live an illusion of free will and happiness, and I'm imperfect. That makes me grow, and become stronger than anything perfect out there! It is because we are imperfect there is a tomorrow! Even you, yourself, aren't perfect!

Kagra: You dare bare your fangs at god? I'm made up of the perfect atomic structure! Why is it you cannot comprehend such things like being perfect? I'm not just a creation of those you call "deities", but I existed since the start! I am the manifestation of the perfect structures in the big bang! I am the big bang! All those "deities" did is bring the pieces of my being together!! I am perfect and so can I do so to the rest of the universe! Do you understand now?

Menlo: No... Because.. You aren't what you describe yourself to be. I know Kagra exists somewhere deep down inside you! You might not be Kagra on the outside.. But on the inside, is the fragment of imperfection! The illusion that fragment has.. We love each other. And I have the illusion that she is there with me, right now. And with that illusion, with our combined power of imperfection.. The need to help each other.. And the illusion behind our motives.. Human emotions.. That illusion has the power to defeat a perfect being! I'm going to save "Kagra"! Even if you are the real Kagra! That illusion exists within you! You've trapped her!!

Kagra: Fuhuhuhu... How can that be though? Kagra is a single being. And that being is me! The one you know is an illusion playing tricks on your mind. You only have a few minutes left to live after I am done retrieving my power completely... How one like you could have somehow obtained my power is quite an amazement, I'll give you credit for coming that far.


Menlo: I didn't take it.. Kagra lent me the powers for a reason... Kagra is an individual being!!!! And you can't be the true Kagra, for you are not the one I loved... The real Kagra is fighting alongside me! She is fighting alongside me even now!! You aren't Kagra.. And you certainly aren't a compassionate guard or goddess either.. You are a monster who had been imprisoning Kagra! And that is why I will defeat you and set her free! I don't care if she was an illusion... I loved Kagra!!!!!!

Kagra: Hmph.. Then prove it to me. Can an illusion and a little boy defeat a perfect being? The manifestation it was meant to be? Defeat me, a perfect being, a god, with your imperfect power. Show me what you truly feel for the illusion of your emotions. Defeat me and not only will I restore your world, but I will give back Kagra. Show me the power.. Of humanity.. And..... Of Kagra!!!


I don't know if this is the right section since this is for a GS hack. But please don't trash this thread..  Move it to a proper forum if it's in the wrong place for some reason.

Tetsuya the Azure Blade

Hmm. This RPG idea of yours, It's TOO GOOD to be just a fan-made hack of a GBA game. This is something...Something that you could see people actually buying online like Laxius Force or the Aveyond series of games. My adivce to you is remove ALL connections to ANY GAME THAT YOUR GAME IS BASED ON and make it in RPG maker AS A GAME THAT YOU HAVE DEVELOPED FROM YOUR OWN IDEAS, Then make a website where people can buy the full game or DL a free 1 hour trial. After that, Just keep developing more great games.

Off topic a bit: Is your Kagra character based on Kagura from InuYasha? And what will your RPG be called anyway? Personally I would call it Runik Blayde: Legend of the Avatars, But that's just me.

Mion Sonozaki

#2
Kagra is not based off of Kagura. Actually, she's based off of a mix between Haruhi (Haruhi series) and Luna (Lunar series).
Her visual appearance is more like a school-girl version of M.Bison/Vega if anything O_o
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v626/pokeman/Kaguraadventurous.png
I'll admit, my original intentions were to have her look similar to Kanna from Inuyasha though. I just have some moe for white-haired anime girls with emotionless faces or something. I constantly reincarnate the design into my protagonists.

The reason she uses fans and daggers is because they're my favorite weapons. Although her signature weapon is fans because of my love for fans as weapons.
There is actually a real martial arts form called Tessenjutsu, believe it or not. However, it is so obscure that those outside of Japan will laugh at you if you bring up the concept of fans as weapons.
Although in reality, iron fans are baddass.


As for selling it, I would eventually copyright/patent the script and concept. However, without any mentions of being a rom hack, of course.
Of course, the copyright would be to simply prevent coroporate bullies from stealing the story (And turning it into a piece of garbage)
I refuse to sell the game unless I direct it and I have a company to aid me. Otherwise, I'm just a 16 year old trying to tell a story through freeware (Or in this case rom hacks..)
And in brutal honesty, I can't put a price on beauty.


Anyways, there are reasons I'm making a rom hack out of this. Such as reasons I've decided to not include in this post since chances are nobody would care anyways. But bottomline is that making this into a rom hack will be the perfect booster to map everything out and it would let a 16 year old like me handle such a project.


*ahem*
Going back on topic:
As for the references my story makes, they're not major enough. It's more of an issue of criticism calling me unoriginal. Xenogears even dedicated an entire scenario to referencing Soylent Green, and I don't see copyright issues. They didn't even try to change the name. So surely a rom hack will get by.
Most of the things I'm referencing are simple excuses to play around with a scenario. Imagine something like this in Golden Sun:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KeUgvD7KUv0&fmt=18
3:50
A dungeon like that would be so awesome... Cooler than the rocks!

Charon

#3
If it's a rom hack it's not exactly like you can copyright it. Hacking is kind of like graffiti in that way - the paint may be yours but the wall isn't >_>

I skimmed through it, and honestly I don't see a problem with making a game with ideas rooted in others, as long as we remember that those aren't your own ideas. Since most likely if it's going to be a rom hack and not a homebrew (which is what it sounds like), it's perfectly okay because you can't copyright it anyhow. Heck, I made my own Pokemon hack with obvious Golden Sun references.

Mion Sonozaki

#4
Quote from: Corvidae on 13, February, 2010, 10:09:18 PM
If it's a rom hack it's not exactly like you can copyright it. Hacking is kind of like graffiti in that way - the paint may be yours but the wall isn't >_>

Woah, woah. Slow down there.
By copyright, I mean in the faaaaaar future. And for the story. Not rom hack.

While being a rom hack naturally prevents this "graffiti" from being stolen unless camelot themselves decide to clean it, the plot is a whole different thing and scenario in a case of law. If you don't approach the court with it as a rom hack, but instead your ideas and story, I'm pretty sure the plans themselves can be patented and that could stop any greedy company trying to earn a quick buck from crapping on what you made.
Law is complicated and very exploitable. What you don't say can get you far.

But until then, this is just a rom hacking project uninvolved with business and I intend to use this as a way to tell my story.

Hey, I dunno if I can double post in my own thread, but I updated the concept art:


Colored Kagra:
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v626/pokeman/Kagracolored.png

Colored Shion:
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v626/pokeman/Shioncolored.png


I'm muuuuuuuch better on digital art >_<
Also, I had a bad surface when coloring Kagra. So excuse the horribad colors..
And sorry the position I scanned Shion was bad =/

Charon

#5
Just edit your post. It's not too big of an update, so...

*merges*

Ooooooh okay. I thought you wanted to copyright the rom hack. It certainly sounded like that. o.o

Your art looks interesting, but you'll need some better paper and supplies. Reason being is because once you get better paper and supplies, you'll never want to go back (it looks oh so much better too). The designs are cool though.

Atrius (He/They)

I almost agree with MegaDarkNero about making it it's own game rather than a ROM hack, of course without a capable team with the necessary skills for such a large project that's not really an option.  With some tweaking, and fine tuning this would be a really good story though.  I like the nanotechnology for creating "magic" concept in particular, I'd actually played around with an idea very similar to that for a story I was coming up with at one point.

I can't wait to see more on this project, don't be afraid to ask for help if you need it.
[sprite=220,4,0]I'm shaking my head in general disapproval of everything[/sprite]

Mion Sonozaki

I will bring my stories to life one day. Until then, I'm just a 16 year old rom hacker trying to get into computer sciences and video game design.
I have many other stories too, but there's no need to bring them up in this thread unless you truly want to hear them, is there?
Maybe I should apply for the GS community project as a writer of the plot :D


Anyways, I finally finished the concept art of Menlo

Colored:
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v626/pokeman/Menlocolored.png

Uncolored:
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v626/pokeman/Menlocolorless.png

In the colored version, noticed the extras I drew? He's actually shaking his scythe because he's nervous and apologizing for apologizing so much xD
I think that's the perfect way to really highlight his low confidence and modesty. But as you red in the concept I have for the climax dialogue, he gathers his courage towards the end of the story.

There is no real plot-related reason Menlo is brown, in case you're wondering. It's as I said in the shout box. Anime in general needs more "color". And I don't mean the stereotypical color that lives in the hood, has a gun for a hand, and talks like a pirate. And besides that, I guess since I have mostly black friends, I was somewhat influenced xD
It's been finalized either way.
I'm still wondering how I should portray the Chronoblade. Should I give it the look of a stereotypical sword? Or should I make the gfx like some steroided scythe?



Also, here's some more gold:

It's concept art for Kyoko. It's old. And I lost the papers. So I can't color it D:




Anyways, I just want to remind you all, feel free to show interest if you want to help me plan out the events and write the script. That's.. Something I have problems with. And in all the time I've searched elsewhere, nobody showed interest in helping me write this >_<

Tetsuya the Azure Blade

This post could be considered necro, But it doesn't matter.
I've decided to change the name of my title suggestion to Runik Blade: Legacy of the Avatars. I initially intended on suggesting that you call the RPG (hack?) Chrono Blade after the most powerful weapon in your game, But I'm pretty sure that nobody wants to be sued by Square Enix! So you should have two uber-swords in your hack (game?) Runik Blade (2nd best sword: Used by all swordfighters. Best ATK boost but has the 2nd best ability: Reflects all damage of an enemy's spells for 1 turn. Cost 150 MP) and Chrono Blade (Best sword: Used by Menlo. 2nd best ATK boost but has the best ability: 3x ATK PWR and enemy loses 1 turn. Cost 300 MP (worth it?)) That Kyoko concept art reminds me of Wriggle from Touhou, Have I been playing those games too often?

QuoteI will bring my stories to life one day. Until then, I'm just a 16 year old rom hacker trying to get into computer sciences and video game design.
I have many other stories too, but there's no need to bring them up in this thread unless you truly want to hear them, is there?
Heh. Me too, But I'm a 17 year old rom hacker trying to get into computer sciences and video game design. Most of my stories have the main dood dying (but winning) in the final battle, But there's no need to bring them up in THIS thread.

Mion Sonozaki

#9
It's not necroposting. I actually want more posts in this thread and I am actually working on a major update as we speak.
As for the name, I am keeping it as Chronoblade because there are other things with the title "Chrono" in their name (Such as Chrono Crusade), and the title was never copyrighted by Square. Ever. That is, of course, unless they want to stir up some heat with the Greeks
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chronos

In Golden Sun tradition, weapons and such are based off of actual mythology. And with a focus of time on that special "fifth" element, it is only rightful for Menlo to use a sword based on time as well.
I'm actually writing the update in which the sword serves a much higher purpose in the story. Basically, it starts off as a sword Togo gave to Menlo when he was younger. But it wasn't just any sword, but a rusted sword that could never break. The lore behind the Chronoblade is that it is frozen in time and Togo, being the ub3r knowl3dgeable guy on the world's top secrets even the antagonists know not, gave it to Menlo, his student, for when he would finally be able to fully possess his abilities over time.
Menlo's element being water instead of wind could also be symbolic in itself since I find water more time-like than wind because water possesses many forms it shifts into over time.
The Chronoblade certainly will be the Sol Blade of this project however, and each other character will also get their own unique "ultimate" weapons. However, they are unimportant to the story and everyone knows the protagonist must always have the best weapon :P


And yes, Kyoko was inspired slightly be Wriggle. You're talking to a class-A touhoutard!!
In fact, originally her design was intended for a danmakufu I scrapped. And she was also supposed to be a beetle loli as opposed to a bee loli.

Anyways, to sum that all up for those who're tl;dr: I'm working on some updates ima post later. OFC, I can't double post, so activity is appreciated.

Salanewt

Rusty legendary sword reminds me of Sword of Mana, but your storyline seems very well done. If you need any help for art, you could ask me (but I never got around to making things for Maxipower, so I should avoid making any promises about making art). It might be best to wait a bit, or find someone who is guaranteed to dedicate their time to helping with art, but you can ask me anyway (more likely for me to make some if you do).

Chronoblade does seem like a good name for the title, and I encourage you to stay with your hack.

Have a nice day.
Oh yeah baby, £ me harder.

Fusion is just a cheap tactic to make weak Adepts stronger.

Yoshi's Lighthouse is a hacking website in progress. Why not check it out if you like Yoshi or the Mario & Luigi games?

Mion Sonozaki

#11
I was thinking of having Shion kill one of the main characters when the plot would twist and she confesses her actions.
Problem is, I cannot kill off a party member for obvious reasons. So I came up with a great alternative. I'm going to introduce a new character and use this as an excuse to add more backstory to Lukas and a plot device to the story.

Post-Rosewood massacre, Kyoko is found by a traveling wind shaman named Setsuna (Who is planned to visually look like a Miko ^_^) who had taken up caring for her after witnessing Kyoko possessed great mystical power abnormal for young children. As she and Kyoko cross paths with Menlo and Co, they join them in hopes to seek answers for just who exactly Kyoko is.
As their adventures continues, she crosses paths with Lukas, and old friend of Setsuna. This creates a friend-ship (With shipping! :P) sub-plot of their friendship after they departed years ago when Setsuna buried herself in her training and Lukas buried himself in his studies.
While at first Lukas joins Menlo for his own knowledge-seeking purposes, when Shion kills Setsuna, that is when Lukas snaps and sets his objective: To avenge her death.
The great thing about Lukas' background is that everything happens in present day as opposed to past experiences like the other characters have.
But here's the real @#$%&*!# thing I'm going to do with her. She's going to try to negotiate a deal with Menlo and Co. in exchange for Setsuna (Her hostage). However, after the deal is made, when she's no longer of use, right in front of Lukas' eyes, she stabs her.
Seriously.. What a @#$%&*! @#$%&*!#. How I plan to make Shion rejoin, I still plan Lukas not to forgive her.



As for Kyoko, I also figured out some plot devices to delve into the personalities of the deities also and expand her importance.
Kyoko will be a "unique" seed of the deities, unlike the other avatars. As opposed to a breathing weapon simply using deity DNA, I want to instead have her serve a completely different purpose as the very daughter of one of the deities.

When the earth deity and his wife had mated, their daughter died when she gave birth. However, using the same data they were originally using in the avatar project, they were able to "resurrect" their daughter into what was originally intended as their earth avatar.
However, because she was the earth avatar, she also bares the responsibility the avatars must possess. Only Kyoko has human emotions..
So Kyoko is actually weaker than the other deities because she is held back by her emotions. But ultimately, as the story progresses, her same imperfectness of emotions give her an upper hand as an avatar in comparison to her "sisters".


The idea I have with Kyoko is to utilize her amnesia due to military experimentation as a plot device for telling the backstory of what her father the rest of the deities were like. Aside form that, I also have in mind for other uses with her flashbacks to tell something with very loose ends, yet open ends.

Kyoko is going to be a character who really fits the saying "A smile is more painful than a frown"
She's going to be the team's cute, loli character. And yet, she also has one of the most unhuman pasts because of the torture she experienced in the military and the massacre she had been driven to preform.
Yet because many things in her past don't give an exact answer, the lack of description really sums up he rhorror.

Not finalized, but thoughts and considerations:


An addition to the final battle where Menlo has to fight Kagra, something I had in mind was for Kagra herself to fight a Ouroboros millipede-variant of some sort while Menlo is fighting "Kagra".

This gives meaning to Menlo's statement in the confrontation against "Kagra" that Kagra is fighting alongside him. But furthermore, it symbolizes that deep inside "Kagra", she is also fighting herself, to fight her immortality and to oppose her very self and true form.
There are various problems with this though. While I said I wanted to inspire things off of my favorite rpgs, at the same time some of these rpgs I am inspired by also utilize similar ideas albeit, in a much different situation and context. A certain other rpg for example has a ouroboros as a final boss for example.
I'm worried I've already borrowed enough concepts already. I'm concerned having a ourobolis would be just plain unoriginal and ripping off even though it is used in a completely different scenario. Is there an alternative to a creature who eats its own tail to represent immortality and reincarnation?



Anyways, here's my progress on chapter 1 so far:

Summary
Quote
Kagra and Menlo lived with Shion ever since they were found by her after the Rosewood tragedy. One day, when Kagra and Menlo were finally old enough, she invited them with her on an excavation.. In the ruins of Kagra and Menloès abandoned home village!^
Shion brings Kagra and Menlo with to investigate the ruins there that were originally forbidden by the town elders. Seeing the village with his very own eyes the first time since the tragedy, he is filled with sorrow. After delving into the ruins and learning about the world, Menlo and Co. reach what looked like a dead end. However, they find a pedstal that was a perfect fit for Togo's sword that was given to Menlo by him when he was younger. Using the sword, Menlo opens the door that is the dead end and they enter the inner sanctum of the ruins and uncover ancient relics revealing secrets of the 4 eggs in the land even Shion knew not of, as well the more often known knowledge Kagra and Menlo simply not knew of.

"Long ago, when earth was all but waste, the atmosphere all but void, the seas all deserted, humans had once suffered äges in hellish, wasteland environments. However, a miracle one day appeared and there came 4 arthropodan deities from another world who took pity upon the humans living in these lands.
These deities, with their combined powers, shaped the land from the deserts and sands they were, into lush, green mountains, giving air and oxygen to the atmosphere and filling the pits of the land into sea and ocean. But most of all, they imbued the planet with magic.
Before they left the world, they created 4 eggs of ultimate power to mantain their magic on the land, as well as 4 "avatars" who guard them. Amongst them, however, was also a central guardian for the entire world in which they created who would act as a goddess, surprassing even the powers of the deities themselves. However, humans eventually raged war for these 4 eggs and that was then when the central guardian formed a wall across the world that was unscalable by foot alone without much effort, creating such an obsctale that ended the wars humans raged against each other.  
To prevent any further wars, the goddess also sealed many ancient relics and the eggs with a seal that would only open to fragments of her own power itself.  Never to be opened by mortals again.. The south of growing vines.. The east of meditating winds.. The west of liquifying fires... And the north of transforming waters.. Neither this chamber either... May she, the goddess reading this, have god speed in her reasons for coming here and blessing it in her presence.."

Shion quickly concludes that this chamber was only able to be opened because Menlo's sword had some connection to the goddess and the tablet explaining the history of the world also hinted at the egg's locations in the world, and similar seals to this room can also be opened by Menlo's sword.

Before them, however, was also another relic... A portrait of a giant bee-like monster atop clouds and heavens, above mountains with a village before...
"The 4 avatars guarding the eggs possessed great powers, but also great knowledge. For one to attack them would smell great doom. However, for one to seek their knowledge would be passed down with great answers.."







But It does not take Menlo long to realize that the monster being portrayed is also..... The monster that destroyed Menlo's village......







They return home where they discuss their adventure in the rooms and end their day.


The following night, Kagra suffers from a nightmare...
"Nothingness... What is this vision...? It's so.. Saddening... There's no one around...  Everyone is.. Gone..?
No Menlo.. No Shion.. My family and friends.. My new home.. And the people we knew.. Are they... Gone...?
So.. Sad.. There is no life... This is just.. So... Sad.......
This can't be a dream... It doesn't feel at all like a dream... This can't be a dream!
No.. More like a vision.. Not a dream....
Everyone is gone... Heh, that makes me sad... But why is it this sensation of nothingness is also so peaceful?
The absense of life.. Where there is nothing that is imperfectedness of war, hate, or tragedy... A perfect life... No life... It's peaceful, yet so saddening to me... What is this? One side of me feels the warmth of our sun.. While the other feels the freeze of pure space... Argh!!
What does this vision want from me!? This isn't right! Not right!!! This.Is.Not.Right!!!!!! This... Isn't... Right.....
...It's no use.....
What am I fighting? Myself?
Heh... It's just a dream after all. And in a bit, I will wake up... It's just an illusion. Everything... Is an illusion........"




Waking up from the nightmare and going outside for some fresh air, Kagra finds Menlo out by the riverside with a full moon reflecting in the water.
They speak about the recent events, as well as their pasts.
It has been long since the day they first met... The day they literally bumped into each other from Menlo, who was running away from a bully and Kagra trying to find a place to hide after she was being humiliated by her classmates.
It was no coincidence that from the turn of events they later became best friends.. No.. It was destiny.. No.. It was fate they would come to know each other!
Their village was not perfect... But it was their pride and village!
And now.. It was destroyed.. All that remained was a bitter tasting shard of destruction.

That is when Menlo pledges a promise to Kagra:
To murder the monster that destroyed their village.. Not with the intent to kill, but to avenge all the innocent people that died and their restless souls that remain trapped by their killer..

With the FBI having the massacre case of their village as closed, disclosing it was a natural disaster that struck their village, there is no one else to believe or stop the creature. However, being the closest witness to the monster and holding the key to the 4 eggs of the world, he may be able to obtain the power to find and bring down the monster that gave everyone such pain..

Menlo pledges.. To embark on an adventure...
To not only free the souls of those in his village who died by the hands of the beast, but to leave behind his past and begin a new day as an adventurer who will solve the secrets of his world and become like his hero Togo.


He tells Kagra to say goodbye to everyone for him after he's gone because he will be leaving alone the following dawn morning to board a ship at the port town of Rickole across the ocean to the northern continent where the eggs lay.
With his eternal, rusted sword as witness, he will uncover the relics of his very own findings, and go where no man has before... To chase his dream and become an adventurer!!!!

WIP Dialogue (I REEEEEEEEEEEEEALLLLLLYYYYY need someone to help me write this)


Quote
Chapter 1: Remniscense
*Darkness CG/Opening Mologue"
Menlo:

This dream I'm having...
What does it mean...?

A fruitful tree.. A young tree.. An overgrown tree... And an old, dead tree..
What does it all mean...?

Small roots.. Long roots....
Why do some roots destroy each other while others don't?

One moment the root is part of the tree. The next it whithers; Die...


This tree.. This imperfect tree.. Could this tree.. And its roots.. All be an illusion.......?

* Menlo's room at Shion's house/Prologue*

Kagra:  Me..o! W... up!  y.u l..p .. r.ck!!! A.g..h!

<Map fades in, Kagra annoyed>

Kagra: Yoohoo! Menlo! Wake up!

Menlo: Huh... Aack!! Kagra! What're you doing in my room!? Don't you know not to open closed doors? Out! Out!!

Kagra: Don't give me that! Shion asked me to wake you up. Besides.. You stayed up all night and ate up my snack I was planning to eat today!

Menlo: Errr.. Sorry.. Is Shion mad at me?

Kagra: She isn't. But I am!! You ate all my chocolate covered crickets!!

Menlo: Ack! Those were crickets!? Aaaaa! Yuck!!

Kagra: Hey! Chocolate covered crickets are of a gourmet delicacy! "Un aliment délicieux!!" Besides. You didn't wonder why the chocolate was cruncy did  you?

Menlo: Urrgh.. I think I'm going to be sick..

Kagra: *sigh* I guess if you're going to throw up, then maybe hold it in a bit longer. Shion really wanted to talk to you.

Menlo: *Gulp*

Kagra: Tsk, I guess there is really no helping you, is there? I'll go on ahead down stairs and meet you there. But Shion said to bring your sword!

Menlo: M-My sword? Togo's?

Kagra: You will need a weapon, won't you? Now that we're older, Shion said we could come with her to explore some old ruins.

Menlo: !!!!

Kagra: I guess suddenly you're not going to throw up anymore, eh?

<Kagra leaves, Menlo approaches his rusty sword lying in his room>

Menlo: (My idol - The great historian and adventurer "Togo" gave me this sword long ago as a gift before he left my old village...  Togo... What an amazing man.. Uncovering ancient relics of the world, charting out new territories... Saving demsels in distress from giant dragons!!!!
*Sish* it's going to be a long time before I ever have an adventure like that, let alone a real adventure outside far away from this island. Togo once told me he was a commander in a war that tool place 10 years ago. He told me it was between a monster army of some sort and the united nations under the Shiro Empire we live under. And that it was his square who defeated them and negotiated peace!
When he came to our village to tell his stories, that was when we met. He quickly became such a hero of mine that I took upon studying as the very student of his!!
However... He was a hero too short..  He left our village very shortly after to depart on more of his adventures. What he gave me to remember him by was this sword. He told me it was a relic that dates back thousands and thousands of years! What's more, is that he also tells me this was the sword the goddess of the land use to wield!!!
But... Even though I was his student.. I'll never follow in his footsteps either and live my dream to become an adventurer..
Reality is, I'm just a loser with a rusted sword. I've never been on a grans-scale adventure. I've never fought huge monsters... And I've certainly never saved a damsel in distrass either from a dragon!!
But.. Someday.. I want to try doing it!!!

<Menlo goes down stairs>

Shion: So Menlo. Did you bring your sword. It's time you came with me on your first "excavation"

Menlo: Eh...?

Kagra: Menlo? I thought you'd be more excited?

Menlo: Oh.. Sorry. I hope I'm not being rude, but by an excavation I usually imagine something large scale and vast. I just get the feeling you're dragging me into some kiddy stuff again.

Shion: Oh Menlo, you're always so pessimistic...  Tsk tsk, Just what am I going to do with you?

Menlo: Where are we going anyways!?

<silence>

Shion: Your home village.

<silence>

Menlo: K-Kagra! Are you sure we should go there!?

Shion: The descision was painful for Kagra too. But the ruins are located in your own village. And this certainly won't be a third-rate adventure either.

Kagra: That's right, Shion. Ancient Ruins lay in our home village. The town elders originally sealed the ruin. But it wont matter anymore now that the elders are god, right?

Menlo: I guess we can go.. But let's not stay on the surface long.. It's dreaded...

Shion: Don't worry. Aside from my job as a historian, I'm also a hypnotist. Remember? I study the mind. I can assure you it's not like you will break down once you enter there. As a defensive mechanism, the mind seals off things it does not want to see. Even when you to confront it first hand, you would not perfectly recall "the tragedy". And even so, you must confront your sorrow. That was then and this is now.

Kagra: Right. So Menlo, did you bring your sword?

Menlo: I sure did! Although it's not really a weapon though. It's rusty and could break any moment...

Kagra: Not quite.. I recall when Togo gave it to you, he said it's a sword that never breaks. I should know!

Menlo: Y-You tested it!? Aaaaa!!

Kagra: Hehee!

Shion: Now now. What're we waiting for? We got a monster rampaging ruins ahead of us!!

Kagra: I'm sorry Shion. But me and Menlo are childhood friends you know!  But you're right.. Let's go!

<Arrival at Kagra and Menlo's village>

Kagra: Here we are...

Shion: The abandoned village of roaring thunder... The ruins must be here somewhere..

Menlo: To see our hometown again this close.. This is horrible..

Shion: Yes.. A monster of some sort attacked your village, didn't it? You and Kagra somehow survived though since I found you by the side of the village after its destruction.

Menlo: We don't truly know much. All we remember was a giant bee monster of some sort and being envelopped by a giant light. When we came to, you found us and took us into your home. All the people we knew... Loved.. They were all killed.. And the damned FBI is passing this tragedy off as a natural disaster because there was no way to prove it was a monster that attacke the village!!

Kagra: Menlo, there's nothing we can do at this point.. But.. I wonder... Is it coincidental we were the only ones who survived? Whatever happened, we were very lucky to have been found by Shion too. After all, she nursed us back to health after we were found wounded!

Shion: Well friends look after friends.. Right? You seemed like a really.. Unique set of people. And once you two woke up, you definitely made things at my house much, much more lively. Hah!

Kagra: Speaking of which, how do you handle a house and everything else at such a young age? You're only 5 years older than us and already you're an experienced historian!

Shion: Eh, it's complicated. But when you have the right strings to pull, it's just a matter of untangling them!

Menlo: Wow Shion. You're amazing!

Shion: I am acquanted with many famous people in the land you know! I was even on an excavation with Togo once before!

Menlo: You were on an excavation with Togo!?!?

Shion: Yup! I could tell you all about it one day. But not now. It's a little gloomy here, don't ya think?

<Inside ruins and rest of the story are incomplete>



Seriously. I need someone to help me write the script.
Also, I'm incorporating the Chronoblade more into the story.
The reason it was able to do what it does was because it does in fact possess the time element because it was once Kagra's weapon. But Menlo can wield it because he also wields time.

Demonbman

IMA HERE TA HALP IN ANYWAY I CAN SIR!

Salanewt

I just took another look at that post regarding Kyoko, and I re-read that you lost the image, so you can not colour it... If you can tell me which colours Kyoko uses, I could try colouring it for you (and probably try to make a portrait as well, though I am currently in the middle of Kagra).

Oh yeah, what colour were Kagra's eyes again please? I would try reading through the topic again, but I will be busy again today (staying home and sick, but I have work to do so I do not fall behind).

Have a nice day.
Oh yeah baby, £ me harder.

Fusion is just a cheap tactic to make weak Adepts stronger.

Yoshi's Lighthouse is a hacking website in progress. Why not check it out if you like Yoshi or the Mario & Luigi games?

Mion Sonozaki

I'll just redraw Kyoko one day on my own accord.
However, Kagra on the other hand has gray eyes.


Pretty soon I'll be making a huge update to this information so I will be starting a new thread though.
All I'm hoping now is golden sun's editor will let us make our own tileset graphics since at this point it might become a bigger necessity than thought.

Salanewt

1) Sounds good.
2) Okay, thanks.

3) New thread? Why not just replace your first post with a message like "This topic has been revamped, please go to this post" or something, and then post the new information in the latest post?
4) I would like that too, the only true way to have Yoshi's Island in my hack (sort of).

Have a nice day.
Oh yeah baby, £ me harder.

Fusion is just a cheap tactic to make weak Adepts stronger.

Yoshi's Lighthouse is a hacking website in progress. Why not check it out if you like Yoshi or the Mario & Luigi games?

thenightsshadow

Haha...
Nostalgia is starting to seep in.

I wish I was as brave as you, Lishy.  I doubt I could muster up the courage to present my RPG like that.
Don't bug me too much.  After all, the 'shadow is always Sirius.

Mion Sonozaki

He he, thanks ^^


But it's still evolving, and soon it will have another thread.


I don't know if I'll be the first to use this kind of sub-genre, but I want to make this its own rpg sub-genre of a "visual novel rpg"


In short, what that means is simple. It is half visual novel, half rpg. There will be many events where there is long bits of dialogue, told through the view point of the protagonist. And if possible, also cutscenes that use BGs as opposed to maps. Think of a battle bg as the backdrop for dialogue to be told. Of course, that is if this is possible.

As such, character development is going to be numerous. Each character's sub-plot could have their own game centered around their backstory.

In other words, cutscenes will be LONGER than golden sun. But it's the only way I can really tell the story, and a smart person wouldn't mind because of save states.


That said, besides long cutscenes, it will play like a normal rpg. One of the focuses I want to do is have towns really free roaming where you can have fun just exploring them.

thenightsshadow

...  Seriously.  I think you could be my motivator.
Don't bug me too much.  After all, the 'shadow is always Sirius.

Mion Sonozaki

#19
Such a compliment from the community project writer. What an honor xD

(Maybe this story should hijack the official community project since it is being so mapped out before a level editor has even been finished :P)